filtercore ([info]filtercore) wrote,
@ 2008-09-08 17:54:00
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Current music:In A Hail Of Deadly Bullets-The Arcane Order

Belter
Today I neglected to pack my belt before I rode to work. When I got changed, it just didn't look or feel right without a belt... especially when I sat down.

Off to the nearby locksmiths I trotted, remembering that they sold belts. They had a weird, one-belt-fits-all arrangement - they punched the holes into the belt as you required. After I understood the concept, I rather liked it... you could get a belt with just the few holes that you needed. It was a pretty thick belt, and a little difficult to use the holes they'd made in it, but it did the trick.

That was until I tried to visit the bathroom, and realised I couldn't take the belt off.

I spent a good 10 minutes trying to pry that little fucking buckle out of its belt-hole in every way you can think of. It is rare I get all mad and HULK SMASH but I was ranging inside this cubicle, let me tell you. The damn fucker would simply not budge.

In the end I had to, er, hold it in - so to speak - and just took the tram home early instead of riding home. It took a pair of pliers and a screwdriver to free myself from the stupid thing.

In related news, I suddenly understand what would happen if Sony made a belt.




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[info]missynaesthesia
2008-09-08 07:59 am UTC (link)
:S :S

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[info]filtercore
2008-09-08 08:08 am UTC (link)
It's very funny in retrospect, but boy was I shitty!*

* Obviously, not in a certain definition of the word

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[info]prerecorded
2008-09-08 08:11 am UTC (link)
oh man in my head this is hilarious! Imagining you getting all heated and frustrated in the loo, trying not to shout at the fucker... hehe

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[info]filtercore
2008-09-08 08:14 am UTC (link)
I was trying to ply it out using a toilet paper holder. Then thinking that I could use my keys, then remembering they were in my backpack and not my pocket, and weighing up how dodgy it would look to go back out and rifle through my bag and pocket something... then re-enter the toilet.

Also, I slipped on piss.

It was definitely a Larry David day ;)

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[info]nosyparker
2008-09-08 09:22 am UTC (link)
Also, I slipped on piss.

Oh damn! D:

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[info]rake_blackguard
2008-09-08 08:56 am UTC (link)
Apparently you all use zipperless pants in the southern hemisphere.

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[info]rake_blackguard
2008-09-08 08:57 am UTC (link)
Ohhhhhhhh.

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[info]alcoholicrobot
2008-09-08 12:54 pm UTC (link)
Perhaps this is the locksmiths answer to the chastity belt?

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[info]jimmyjack
2008-09-08 01:31 pm UTC (link)
LAUGHED A GREAT DEAL

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